SAMUT SARI

13 GOING 30 – Ang saya-saya! Jennifer Garner really looked like a 13 y.o. trapped in a 30 y.o body. Mark Raffalo was lovable. And it actually made me miss good old 80’s music and clothing. 80’s party anyone?

THE TERMINAL – Wow! The Steven Spielberg-Tom Hanks tandem just did it again. Ang galing. Simple stories are always the best to tell. It also had a lot of subtle sense of humor. I was laughing more and laughing harder here than Dodgeball. Bonus item for this movie: Diego Luna! Great cast along with Tom (uy, close). I have always adored Stanley Tucci. Then there was the Boston Public principal and that forever security guard. Lots and lots of familiar faces. A must-see movie for those who love feel good stories.

WALA PA AKONG MATINONG TULOG!!!
After parting ways with the gang at 12 MN, I couldn’t get to sleep. By 3 AM, I started hitting the keys of the typewriter. Since it would have been a Bistro night if I were in Manila, this is what came up. (Edited and revised version)

SA BAR
(9-30-04, 330AM)
Sa loob ng bar, iba-iba ang kulay ng ilaw na ginagamit. Dilaw, pula, asul, berde. Hibang ang sinumang magtangkang gumamit ng putting ilaw. Papaano, ang mga makukulay na ilaw na ito ay nagpapanggap lamang na ilaw. Wala itong intensiyon na magbigay liwanag. Ang tanging silbi nito ay ikubli ang dilim na nagbabalatkayong liwanaga.

Hindi pulutan o serbesa ang tunay na pinupuntahan ng mga customer sa mga lugar na ito. Kasangkapan lamang sila para lumuwang ang dila at makawala ang kaluluwa mula sa pait at sakit ng pagiging tao.

Sa bawat lagok ng San Miguel, para bang nilalabnaw nito ang hinagpis ng loob ng umiinom. Pait na isinabote. Pinapasarap ng lamig. Higit pang pinapasarap ng sakit. At ang pulutan. Nariyan para magbigay ng konting alat o konting anghang sa buhay na nawawalan na ng lasa dala ng paulit-ulit na indak na nakasanayan na. Nakasanayan at napagsawaan. Para bigyan lasa ang hangaring makatikim ng bago. Kahit ang laman ng isang kutsara ay mantika, asin, vetsin at kolesterol, walang pag-aalinlangan na isinusubo, nginguya at ninanamnam. Pampalasa, pagmpagana. Bagay sa pait ng beer.

May ilan na kahit hindi talaga nagyoyosi ay napapayosi sa bar. Sinasabayan ang nagbabalat-kayong dilim sa pagmamaskara ng damdamin ng dumadayo doon. Binabalot ang mukha, pinapapula ang mata, minsan napapaliha. Para may dahilan na maibigay kapag pumatak na. Dahil sa usok kamo. Ang makapal na usok na nagkukubli ng buong paligid, ng buong pagkatao. Makapal na usok na nagmimistulang langit. Pero maari ring mapagkamalang impyerno kapag nasinagan na samutsaring kulay ng kadiliman.

Nanduon sa gitna ng stage ang musikero na patuloy na tumutugtog ng kanyang gitara. Kahit hindi lahat nakikinig sa kanya, patuloy pa rin siya. Hindi na rin naman mahalaga kung sino ang nakikinig o hindi. Ang mahalaga sa kanya ay umawit. Awitin ang himig ng kanyang buhay na hindi nalalaman o napapansin ng mga ibang nagtatangkang makinig dahil sa mga ito, kuwento nila ang lumalabas sa kanyang bibig at hinuhuni ng kanyang gitara. Sa isip ng musikero, mali kayo. Mali kayo dahil kanta ko ito.

Sa bar, nagtatapos ang gabi sa umaga. Lasing, bundat, tumatawa. Salamat sa bar na hindi humuhusga sa nagbabalatkayo. Sa totoo lang, tumutulong pa itong magpatuloy ang pagtatago at pagkubli mula sa mundo, mula sa sarili.

Uuwi ang bawat isa. Ang waiter, ang manager, ang mag-aawit, ang mga customer. Pagdampi ng likod sa kama, may lungkot na madarama. Dahil maya-maya lang, nariyan na uli ang mapanghusgang liwanag ng araw.

FOOL MOON RISING

It was a crazy three days.

Sunday.
11 PM, I got ready to leave for Tandag which is 9 hours away from Davao.

MONDAY
1230 AM. The bus left.
130 AM. Bus got in a near-accident. Fell of a part of the road that was being made. Tires buried in mud. People screamed when it was happening. I wasn't feeling anything as I knew I wasn't going to get hurt. We were two feet from the ledge.
2 AM. Another Bachelor Express bus gets into the same near accident as we did and bumps into our still bus. People got more ruffled.
230 AM. A bus fetched us.
The rest of the time, I was flitting in and out of sleep never fully being rested. My back and neck hurt from sleeping sitting down. Every bump and curve took me out of sleep and made me think "are we going to get into another accident?"
11 AM. I arrive in Tandag. Tired.
1130 AM. The priest greets with me "lakaw na ta?" I just got there! Ano ba? But he did say we will have lunch first.
1 PM. We leave Tandag.
120 PM. Trekking begins. I was ill-humored the whole time, barely speaking. The whole time I was wondering to myself, for what god-damned reason did i apply for this job? No answer.
430 PM. We arrive. I still wasn't speaking. Still asking the same question. Still no answer.
8 PM. I sleep. Good sleep. Weird dream about a guy I have not thought about in ages.

TUESDAY
7 AM. Breakfast.
8-1030 AM. Observe teachers.
11AM. Talk with teacher. Made her cry.
12 NN. Lunch. One teacher resigns.
1250 PM. Trek begins.
220 PM. We arrive. In my mind, why the hell did we not take this easier, less stressful route? You have a guest! Pusangalaw.
4 PM. I take a bath (after two days).
530 PM. Bus leaves for Davao.

I recount the past days and I feel so overwhelmingly tired. But I couldn't imagine myself doing anything else still. The only consolation I am hoping for tired sleep.

Except it did not come. Because of the one of the most breathtaking sights I have ever seen in my life.

A round, orange full moon was rising over the still blue sea. It was as if I could pick it like a ripe fruit if I just stretched out my hand to the air. The whole scene took my breath away. Literally. I said to myself, "God, thank you for beautiful things like this."

Dusk in the countryside is different from that of the city. The beauty of nature is subdued by the endless colors that overpower each other. Stars are but dots in the sky. The moon is but another streetlight orb. That is the city.

But in the countryside. Everything is dark. Blue gray skies and black green trees. That's about it. A small light kilometers away is like a beacon in the night. And seeing the fool moon hanging so low in the sky, lighting the infinite night... you could just imagine how majestic, how awesome it was.

I thought of the moon in Greece, in Egypt, in Salem, at a time when electricity was not even an idea. No wonder they worshipped the moon. No wonder werewolves and witches and warlocks and vampires come out this time. The mystery of its light, so bright yet so gentle. Unlike the sun that beats hard upon the nape and bites hard on the skin.

I am a moon child. Hiding in the moon's shadow. Reveling in the moon's beams.

That scene was one of the best I have seen in my lifetime. And for those few precious minutes, I need not worry of life and love. It was only Luna that mattered.

A HAIR(Y)-RAISING EXPERIENCE


The day felt like the Amazing Race. So when we took a break from the jet skiing and has some snacks, Fr. Lennie took out his balut stock. I figured, might as well take it to the level of Fear Factor. You see, I do not eat balut. I hate the idea of sticking a whole creature in my mouth and chewing it to bits.

But since it was a day of firsts, might as well, eat something for the first time. So I had Cadoosh coach me. Crack the top, drink the soup. Yeah, I had gotten that far before. Then peel off the shell then take a bite. I did. Yummy yolk. Steph also took a bite. No chick yet so far so good. Another bite. Still okay. Not bad. Then finally, the last one. I took a peek at the balut and it was such a large chick! Euw! But I needed to take my courage to another level. I closed my eyes and popped in the entire thing in my mouth.

YUUUUUUCCCCCCK! There was too much hair! I think I heard the beak crunch. AAAAAAAAHHH! I chewed as fast as I could. I wanted to get it over with. After I was able to swallow, I took a swig of my Coke and downed the remaining half and even asked for more from Steph. Then I ate Vjandep pastel to take away the taste of chick hair. Aaaaaaah! I could still feel the hair in my throat. Much like the pesteng ahem. Eeeeuuuuuwwww!

But despite not fully appreciating the joys of eating balut, I was proud to have finally known what it is that I do not like about it. And I do finally understand what is so good about the delicacy. Except it was not enough to make me want to join along the balut bandwagon. Still, I conquered A fear. Woohoo!

BASANG SISIW
Dusk has begun to snuggle gently along the flailing coastline and the silent mountain terrains. Jerber, Ninin, Steph, Cadoosh and I have been wet since 9 AM and are all looking forward to a proper bath with soap and shampoo. Nobody was saying anything, but I have a feeling all of us were famished since we had not eaten a decent lunch (remember our peanut butter-chocolate-bread stix sandwich).

We were also coordinating with Cristalle to have dinner with Jeff and the two gay doctors. Though we weren't rushing Fr. Lennie, I for one, was hoping we could get to Lumbia as soon as we can. But Fr. Lennie needed to buy some stuff from SM, and Steph wanted to canvass for rechargeable batteries. So, we went inside SM like wet chicks inviting stares from the dry people. The guard from ACE hardware actually took a long hard look at us and even asked what we wanted. D-uh! Palagay mo? E di world peace! Anubayon!

After getting our purchases, Fr. Lennie invited us to have halo-halo in Ice Castles. We were damp in an air-conditioned mall and will be eating brain-freeze food. I could feel my innards shivering at the thought already. But free food is free food. Yum, yum, yum! Mais con hielo. Yum, yum, yum!

TIRE-SOME TRIP HOME
I was so excited for dinner already. My tummy was having an internal revolution. Gas bombs were close to exploding. I don't think the peanut butter and corn helped.

None of our plans ever pushed through the way we wanted it during the day. But everything turned out fine. We had to cancel with Cristalle, Jeff and Tobie because Fr. Lennie had dinner prepared for us already.

I couldn't care less who we ate with as long as we ate. But man-o-man, a flat tire was just the perfect way for a day coming to a close. Fr. Lennie had to call someone from the kumbento to bring a car and help change tires. You see, we were all inutil creatures of the earth. And despite Fr. Lennie knowing how to, it would not be good for his back and heart to exert that much effort.
While waiting for Leoncio, I was asking Jerber how to change the tires. My mom has been forcing me to take driving lessons soon (and I will), so I figured might as well figure out how a car works and how to change tires. I wouldn't want to be a driver who does know what the hell she is running in the first place.

Leoncio finally got there and got ready to change the tires. I was observing everything when Fr. Lennie suggested that I give it a try. Ho-o nga naman! That would be fun (or so I thought)! (Remember we were riding a 4-ton pick-up.)

STEP 1. Loosening the nuts
I used all my strength (which was not much) but hell, nuts were way tight. Nin and Steph gave it a go to no avail. Jerber and Cadoosh being smart people, didn't even bother. When it was Leoncio's turn, one try and it was loose. And he was just about as big as I was.

STEP 2. Jacking up the jack
Leoncio spun the jack with such speed, something like 30-40 revs per minute. When it was my turn to try, I was such a slowpoke! And then when the jack finally hit the spot, I was having a hard time turning the lever already. I could feel my muscles ripple underneath my skin. My guts and my neck could feel the tension as well. I was running out of breath. Finally, I gave up and handed it over to Leoncio. Ngek! Ilang turns na lang pala, good to go na. Ngek!

STEP 3. Removing the tire.
Sisiw.

STEP 4. Putting on the spare tire.
Manok. Mabigat eh. Pagod na ako, si Leoncio na lang.

STEP 5. Tightening the bolts
Kahit kapoy (pagod) na, I wanted to try it still. Pretty easy until you get to the tightening part. I had to leave that to Leoncio because I think despite the extreme effort I put on making the nuts tight, they were still not tight enough.

Despite being a loser at it, I was pretty proud of myself. Fr. Lennie did console me with the thought that it was a 4-ton truck and that a regular car would be a less stressful tire change. I don't have to be so dum-dum about it in case we get a flat in the future.

Galing!

PAGLILINAW NG PAGKATAO
The rest of the group had to take a bus back to Davao already so they were not able to meet up with the others anymore. It was up to Cadoosh and me to make up for that. When we got to Inilog Grille, Cristalle and Jeff, Tobie, Vince and Kahlil (the gay doctors) were there already.

Vince moved a bit so I can sit beside Kahlil. Appparently, K wanted to get to know me better because he was really aliw with bisexuals. Whaaaaa? He seriously honestly thought I was bi?! Not that I mind but it was just funny.

I had to tell him, "K, Sorry to disappoint you but I like guys. I AM fascinated with girls and like looking at their bodies, but I still prefer boys. BUT, if I do decide to become one, I will let you know."

And then Tobie says, "Di pala sila couple."

Si K naman goes, "you really thought we were a couple? As in, no. We're the type who likes straight guys so di puwede. Ganun lang talaga kami. Paano pag nakita niyo pa kaming magbarkada? Orgy."(Something like that.)

So things were finally set straight that night.
Jeff and Cristalle loved each other (that was pretty much clear).
I am not bi, but likes looking at girls.
V and K were not a couple. V is gimikero. K is manang (and Intarmed!).
Tobie is psychic and will turn 31 after midnight.
Cadoosh likes beer (huh?).

AND THUS ENDS THAT WEEKEND. A very interesting experience of first-times and blissful encounters. :)

JET SKIING



(unfortunately, no jet ski picture. we just pose before we got on the ski)

MISTAKEN IDENTITIES
Still damp from the white water rafting experience, we hopped on the jeep in high spirits. Even other groups were still reveling from the day. There were two gay doctors who we thought were a couple with us. Our conversation lead to the human body (no specific anatomical part yet) that somehow got me blurting out, “hay naku, I like looking at female bodies more than the male body. Para kasing ang tigas-tigas. Yuck!” Which lead the gay doctors to think that I was bisexual. Which I thought was a joke. So when the jeep dropped us off in the convent, we parted ways with very confused identities.

MANIAC DRIVERS
When Fr. Lennie finalized the jet skiing trip, we got on his 4-ton pick up. Clothes still damp from the river, skin roasted from the sun and muscles aching from the paddling. But pretty much excited.

I was REALLY excited. Jet skiing was one thing I have always wanted to try. But then I felt it too expensive for my pockets. And now, we can do it for free. Yahoohey!

We got to the beach and saw Fr. Lennie’s friend with his jet ski hitched on his Pajero. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Tito Peter, the owner of the jetski, had his people bring it to the beach. He asked for his first volunteers. Nin and I were it. Thank God he had life vests. I’m not sure if I would have bothered to try if there weren’t any.

Nin had first go. I was the passenger. That girl was a LUNATIC! As in kaskasero. My heart was thumping so hard. I’m not sure if it was because it was of Ninin or because it was my first time. I have never felt so nervous about an adventure before. This was it. What’s worse, we fell of the jet ski. I saw the orange of my vest, and the bubbles and the green of the sea surround me. I love my life vest. I love my life vest. I think I forgot to breath when we surfaced. The jet ski looked so far away when it was actually a meter or two away. The current was so strong and I really have trouble swimming in the sea. Good thing I didn’t have time to think of how deep the water was because I was more concerned with getting to the ski.

I finally had a go with the jetski. I was such a nervous wreck that I couldn’t bring myself to go over 20 mph. Being on the wheel was less scary than being at the back. But then, I was too scared I just tried for about three minutes.

If I was scared of Ninin, Jerryberry petrtified me. I insisted being sandwiched between him and Nin. Usually I hate being between people, but if that meant my life… being palaman is fine. My heart might just have gone as fast or even faster than the jet ski. Agh!

I thought I have finally used up my box of courage from the Wizard of Oz. But hey, I may be as crazy as Nin and Jerber. Despite being fearful, I asked for another go at the jetski. This time, it was Steph that was my passenger. Steph is my favorite passenger since she was quiet most of the time. So I was able to go fast.

TAKING THE WHEEL… or whatever you call it
I revved up to 40 mph (I think 49 was the max) jumped over and/or broke into waves. I even dared go further into the sea despite worrying about falling off and having to battle the currents. We came to the part of the sea where the waves were so big, swimming would be very, very difficult especially for a non-swimmer like me. (The idea just suddenly terrified me this very moment. My heart is going kabooog-kabooog that it makes me want to puke. Talk about retroactive reaction!). I was starting to enjoy maneuvering the ski and riding the ocean.

When Steph got down and Ninin got up, I asked if it was okay for me to drive again. Nin was nice about it and let me. I did ask her to be not shout out too much because it freaks me out. It always gives me the feeling that we would be falling down any minute. A few minutes of test driving with Nin, both of us were shouting as we rode against the waves and went farther and farther into the sea.

UNDER THE MISAMIS SUNSET
The sun was about to set and it was getting dark. I finally went back to the shore because my courage was dimming along with the day. Tito Peter who was waiting for us asked us if we wanted to ride to the island. Of course we did! I asked Tito Peter if could hold on tight around his waist because I was really scared. He was nice enough to let me.

And so we rode. He drove the jet ski smoothly and with confidence. I was less nervous now but I still held on tight with my hands clasped hard. We were going further and further into the sea, nearing the land stretch. The water was getting calmer because it was getting deeper. Even the air seemed to have changed. We approached a cove where the waves crashed against the cliff walls. It was beautiful and getting there was really exciting.

When we got back, the sky was a magnificent hue of red. It was a different experience of the sunset. Instead of looking out into the horizon seeing the clouds change from white to red to gray, we were under it. It felt like I could just stretch out my hands and touch it. The sea had a slight tinge of red as well. The jet ski was in constant motion so I was getting pretty much relaxed at the back seat. It was an almost solemn end.

LESSON LEARNED
It was a different experience. I’m not sure if I’ll pay for future use of a jet ski. At least now, I’m not ignorant about it and I finally understand what the fuss is. Lesson learned: I should really, really take swimming lessons so I could do more adventure stuff next time.

SKIMBOARDING
When we got down, we saw Steph and Jerber trying out skimboarding. They made friends with two teen-age boys by the shore. It looked easy when they were doing it, but Jerber seemed to be having difficulty. They let me try, and man! Was it hard! It really takes a certain skill to be in single motion with the skim board. Skateboarding is actually much easier. But again, it was another first time experience for me. :)

(balut at gulong, sa susunod!)

WHITE WATER RAFTING CONTINUED



FIRST TWO HOURS
The first hour already gave me the idea of what laundry in the washing machine felt like. Not too bad actually, but clothes in the washing machine are safer as there is no possibility of bumping against rock.

Rupert once again challenged our group to try paddling standing up. As you have already figured out by now, the people in our raft were willing to try anything. Rupert had us shift our weight to our inner feet for more balance. We then approached the rapids and he yelled, “forward!” So we paddled like maniacs while shouting like lunatics. Woohoo! Mas exciting!

By this time we were getting used to the river. There were many points that we weren’t paddling anymore and just going with the rapids, unless there is potential danger of banging our heads against a cliff wall. Jerber, being so relaxed, actually fell of the raft in one of the milder rapids. Kasi naman, he didn’t secure our feet and had this nuninuninuninu look on his face while we were all paddling. The way he fell, it looked like he intentionally jumped in. And so we had to pull him up on the raft this time. I finally got my WEDGIE REVENGE!!! Even if he was already able to heave himself up the boat, I still pulled at his vest to give him a wedgie no mother can be proud of. Unfortunately, NR siya. Hmph. Whatever.

LUNCH. YUM.
Finally, we stopped over a small patch of sandy ground where we could have our lunch. Guess what? We didn’t bring any. Ganda! Thank God, Cristalle brought bread, peanut butter and chocolate. The chocolate was so melted from the heat, but with our imaginations as wild as the rapids, we imagined it to be fondue. It was a carbo-loading lunch. We had peanut butter, chocolate, bread stix sandwich with a swig of pepsi twist. The pepsi twist were donated by the guides. We had a feeling we looked so pathetic feasting on junk food, they decided to give us more.

By this time, I could see that my thighs were beginning to roast in the sun because we didn’t put sunblock. Hay naku! I don’t know why I didn’t bother when in my field work I always, always put sunblock. Stupid. Now my thighs, honest-to-goodness, look like roasted skin of a pig (di ba their skin is closest to ours), good enough to eat (but cholesterol laden with all the fat).

SNAKE HUNTER
The river side of the Cagayan River teemed with interesting wildlife. Birds, dragonflies and butterflies of all color and size with a bonus sighting of bayawaks. The fun part was once initiated by Rupert. He saw a snake sleeping in one of the holes of the wall. So he made us paddle near it so he could get it for us. Nobody was perturbed with the idea and were actually eager to have a go at it. We amateurishly paddled forwards, backwards and around to get to the hole. Finally, Rupert was able to get the snake. Cool! RUPERT IS THE MAN!

But the snake fell down Rupert’s paddle (which he used to hold snake) and into the river. It was the first time I saw a snake swim. Whoa! It was so fast and graceful! The snake skimmed the water with its head up and went back to the direction of the cliff. It looked for hanging roots and branches and twisted itself around it looking for a way to find a hole in a wall and get back to its sleep we disturbed. We attempted another try to secure the snake but unfortunately, we couldn’t synchronize our paddling to match the speed of the reptile. Ah well, the activity itself was really fun. :p

CROSSING THE RAPIDS
There was a part of the river where there was a huge tunnel on the cliff wall. The water raged under it as small boulders and big rocks lined the river bed. Our task was to cross the river from one side to the other. The thought of it seemed easy. I have been used to crossing rapids before. Except I had Quint with me those times. We were asked to clutch on the vests of the people to our left and right. The current was so strong, we could hardly keep standing. Like a sideway choo-choo train, we dragged our feet ever so slowly. Despite our number, the water still pushed us back. I even bumped my shin against a rock. The cross was a test of team effort. When we made it across, I finally remembered to breathe.

And after a burst of oxygen, I got to enjoy the view. In that part of the river, the water was crystal clear. The sunlight danced on the crests of the bobbing current and also enhanced the beauty of the plants lining the cliff wall.

Of course, we had to take a picture of that moment. Saya!

THE REST OF THE WWR EXPERIENCE
After that, everything was pretty much routine. By this time, we were just practicing slapping our paddles flat on the river or splashing water at each other (which was actually soothing as the sun was beating and breathing hard all over us) or making fun at each other. I also took time to converse with Rupert and discovered that his life is just really guiding people to adventure trips. Mountain climbing, spelunking, river rafting and all that. The other guides with us were just fresh out of high school. Wow! What a life.

I was feeling a bit sad as we were making a countdown of the rapids. 3 more to go. 2 more to go. Last one. Shucks. It was about to end. After the last rapids, Rupert let us drift along the river to enjoy the last moments of Cagayan River.

All good things have to end, indeed.

BUT NOT THIS DAY!

Fr. Lennie, Nin’s uncle, has a friend who has jet ski and was willing to let us have a go at it.

WOOHOOOOOOOO!

(magpapatuloy uli!)

AMAZING RACE. AMAZING PHILIPPINES.

Before I go on with my own Amazing Race story, I'll go to Amazing Race 5 first.

CHIP AND KIM WON!!! Yey!

They were my favorites with the last seven couples left. I just dislike Colin and Christie too much. Scheming and manipulative is fine, but disrespectful and hot-headed is another thing. Brandon and Nicole are okay. The Bowling Moms are cool. For chubby, matronly ladies to reach the last four is a feat in itself. And hey, Palawan itself is already a reward!

During the last leg, I was all tense fearing that the jerk and bitch may just win the million dollars. But much to my joy it was Hootie, er, Chip and Kim, who made it. Woo-hoo!

But I felt a bigger winner because the Philippines was so beautiful. It was such a thrill seeing our flag and Rizal Park and Coconut Palace (where I had my sophomore night in high school) and other familiar places and situations (traffic and ma-diskarte drivers!). Ang ganda-ganda ng Pinas!

Hopefully, Amazing Race will be the break the Philippines is looking for in tourism.

And finally, someone I rooted for actually won. Yey.

A BLESSED DAY OF FIRSTS

EXCITEMENT BUILDING UP
The idea of a Wild Over Water adventure like PGMA still has not entirely dawned on me yet, despite being just a few hours away from it. Maybe because it is rare that in major trips like this that I am just a participant rather than organizer. I left Davao with hardly an idea what the plans for my weekend was.

But honestly, I was quite nervous. Despite my love for thrill and adventure, my inability to swim hinders me from going extreme. White Water Rafting was something I have always thought to be extreme. So while waiting to be fetched by the service, I was asking the other people whether I should bring an ID or would my ring and ankh necklace be enough as identification if and when I do not make it. PRANING!

Finally, the jeep arrived with other river rafters. To my surprise, there was this chubby, cute 7-year old kid and another one a bit older with us. So seeing them around made me feel less paranoid and more excited. Aaaaaaaah! I’m going WHITE WATER RAFTING!!! WOO-HOO!!!

While the jeep was going to the start-off point, we could see the river snaking its way below. Because of the previous night’s rains, the water was brown instead of white. Oh well. But then the current would be stronger and thus more exciting. Trade-offs. I can take that. And then we were there.

Everyone received a set of equipment – a helmet, a buoyancy vest and a paddle. Interestingly, the vest had locks at the crotch area, too. I knew it was for extra safety precaution but it was only during the actual river rafting that I realized what it was for. Anyway, we went down to the river where we received instructions on how to paddle and what to do in case we fall out of the boat (yikes!).

The excitement in me was building up. I can’t wait to begin! We were divided into smaller groups with separate guides. Our guide turned out to be the one who assisted PGMA and Mike Arroyo! Asteeeg! Rupert is the guy with the red bush hat in the WOW Cagayan de Oro billboards and brochures.

We got on our rafts and paddled gently. Actually, we didn’t do much work because the river did much of the propelling anyway. The paddling only happens during the rapids and when changing directions. A burst of excited energy were all abound in our raft. Jerber, Cadoosh, Steph (current volunteers), Ninin (former JVP), Tobie (new found friend from Union Cement) and I just kept on laughing and joking and making fun of anything and everything.

I JUMP. YOU JUMP.
Soon enough, a bridge came into view. Below it were relatively quiet waters. Rupert asked if we wanted to jump from it. Cadoosh declined and offered to take our pictures instead. Tobie was scared but thought of trying because it was one of his to-do things in life. Nin, Steph and Jerber could all swim and were brave souls so they didn’t think twice. I didn’t think twice either, but I couldn’t stop my knees from shaking. Rupert instructed us that once we were on the platform, we should immediately jump without thinking. Just make sure we have our bodies straight and our chins up.

We arrived near the platform first, but our picture taking took quite some time that others got ahead of us. I could help but feel glad that I was not the only one who was afraid of jumping. Others attempted but went back. Others took a bit of time. Still others didn’t even bother to try. When it was our turn, I asked Ninin to jump first as I needed the courage booster. She had a nice shout to go with it.

It was my turn. Took a quick glimpse of the water. Aaaaaaahhh!!! Afraid!!! I have to do this. I have to do this. I closed my eyes and JUMPED. Aaaaaahhhhh!!! My mind kept waiting for the splash but it took so long to arrive, until I finally got in the water, felt all the bubbles around me and the vest buoy me up back. Woo-hoo!!! I jumped. It was a nasty feeling. I’ve always disliked the feeling of falling. Yet, it’s fun. One of life’s paradoxes. So after Steph and Jerber followed suit, we had another go.

During the jump I discovered the use of having the vest tied around our crotch. It could very well slip off during a fall. Extra safety precaution is always good. Except this one hurt. Each jumper got a bad case of wedgie. Blech. I definitely will never be a thong-lady.

Tobie could not get himself to jump. He was just too afraid. Rupert actually left him behind for the other guides to take care of because he was taking too long. Before the river bend, Rupert asked us, “gusto niyo magpa-agos?” We could actually just float along the river and he’ll pick us up after the bend. Of course we would like to! So we jumped out of our raft and went with the flow. Saraaaaaap! Except for the part that we were getting that uncomfortably irritating wedgie again. Euw.

Getting back up the raft was another problem. It was too high for us to just heave ourselves with the current going on. So Jerber, with a mischievous smile on his scheming face, grabbed my vest, dipped me in the water and heaved me up the raft like laundry. More wedgie pain. Grsh. Nonetheless, I will have my revenge on him later on in the trip. :p

(magpapatuloy)

BLESSED BLISSFULL WEEKEND OF FIRSTS

So much happened over the weekend that I may just use up so much space with my kuwento. But what the heck! This is one of the posts I am sure to look back into a few months from now. One of those posts that would tell me, "Girl, this much fun is possible in one weekend. As is, so much 'enjoyable' pain."

We left Davao 3 AM Saturday for Malaybalay. Originally, I was supposed to split up with the group and go to my old JVP area in Pangantucan and just meet up with them in Cagayan. But then, I found out they were going to Transfiguration where the Benedictine monks are. For the last five years that I have been passing by Bukidnon with my trips, I have never been there. So I skipped Pangan and went with Jerber, Nin and Steph to Malaybalay.

MALAYBALAY
With no definite plans whatsoever, Nin brought us to the Cartwheel dorm. Unfortunately, everyone was up in Miarayon. So instead we decided to pass by the Jesuit Retreat House to say hi to Jesuits who have no idea of our existence.

The blessings begin. A newly-transferred Jesuit happened to be Jerber's substitute teacher in Ateneo high school and recognized his eyes. When you see Jerber's eyes, you wouldn't forget it either. Mukhang di gagawa ng mabuti. Hehehe! Joke lang. So Fr. Earl and Bro. Quips invited us to breakfast and had a chat with us. We just asked if we can leave our bags while we go around town, to which they agreed to.

On our way out, Bro. Quips asked us where we were going and offered his services as chauffer. He brought us to the Kaamulan grounds where we took a hike (not that we know we were going to) and saw pine trees on the left and pine trees on the right and pine trees in front... But the weather was lovely, so it was okay. After our hike, we spent most of the morning sitting down watching high school kids practice cheering with their white and yellow pompoms.

When we went back to the JRH, I finally get to meet Quark Henares' sister who is a current JVP in Malaybalay. Our plans kinda got mixed up because the Jesuits invited us for lunch and Bro. Quips volunteered to take us to the Transfiguration. Being freeloaders, we took the offer (anything given for free and with generosity should always be received with enthusiasm!) and agreed to meet Cristalle in Cagayan the next day.

TRANSFIGURATION
Ang ganda-ganda! If I would ever get married in Mindanao, this would be the place. More known for it's architectural pyramid design and glass panels, it actually had a great symbiotic relationship with the surroundings. In the immediate vicinity were manicured lawns and colorful plants and flowers. When in the Transfiguration, it feels like being at the center of the world. The world strecthed out like an infinity of jade and emeralds running up and down the mountains. Look any which way and there was breathtaking scenery. On one side of the world, the rain fell in sheets. The other, a vast azure sky lined with cotton candy clouds.

After being driven away by the drizzle, we passed by the wares sold by the Monk's. The famous Monk's Blend coffee were being sold by packs. Unfortunately, not one of us were true coffee drinkers. We opted instead for a Selecta coffee crumble ice drop. Something tasted different with it. It was more bitter now, more coffee-flavored than before. When I checked the wrapper, it has a Monk's Blend symbol. The Monk's were actually supplying the coffee for Selecta. Ang galing! I actually like the taste better now.

And so we got back to the JRH, went to an anticipated mass, said our good-byes and got ourselves ready for Cagayan de Oro. Just a sleep away from white water rafting and I still couldn't understand whether I'm excited or not.

Our home for the night was in Lumbia, where Ninin's Jesuit uncle, Fr. Lennie, was parish priest.

I stop here first. My exciting Sunday to come tomorrow.

This was what my horoscope said yesterday. Which I just read today.

You've never been afraid to take a chance, and that goes double for today. No dare will be too great, no chance too risky. Sounds like fun, but do be careful.

Which was so appropriate because yesterday I went
WHITE WATER RAFTING
JET SKIING
ATE BALUT

Yeaaaaah! Kuwento soon. Right now, as Nin appropriately stated, "my body is in a general state of sore." Saya.

ADVENTURE

I was supposed to be in South Cotabato this week except it got cancelled because there is NPA presence. Much as it would be exciting, I don’t think it would be fun to get caught in a crossfire or be held hostage. So I’m glad with that.

Sunday… White Water Rafting. Though the idea is still not settling in my insides. Haven’t packed and I don’t have the sandals for that. My five-year old Calapan-made sandals is still lost in limbo and has not found its way back to be. Sob. Sob. I feel worse about its loss than when I accidentally flushed my phone in the toilet. Five years is too long. That’s longer than any committed relationship I have ever had. Sigh.

Anyway, I already wrote an entry for my Compostela Valley trip last week, but it does not seem to fit my mood. Will just summarize it with some general observations.

The Mansaka as a race are generally beautiful in nature. Their face are quite ruddy and bright. Plus they are taller than most tribes.

My arrival was very much welcomed. At one point, I was close to tears because of the overwhelming gratitude that I felt.

The Banlud children, despite being boisterous and rowdy, were very lovable. But believe me, there were so many times I wanted to boot them out of the classroom. One of the children looked uncannily like my ex when he was a kid. And the funny thing was, the kid kept staring at me. And when we were in the classroom, he kept asking for help with his writing. It was so funny.

I discovered that my Body Glove bag which I have always believed to be waterproof was not. Rather it was simply water-resistant. Walking under the rain while crossing the river finally took its toll on my bag. Good thing I have most of my clothes in Ziploc bags.

I am so glad I bought those mountaineering pants from Habagat. It does not get wet easily and it dries off quick. Perfect for my job. Methinks I will be getting another pair one day.

Though I walked, climbed, got soaked, got muddied and all that, I really enjoyed this trip. It was pretty relaxing compared to the other ones I’ve done. Though I would have been a happier woman if there was a decent bathroom. It is always hard to take a bath with your clothes on and take a crap with a bowl that’s buried in the ground. Euw.

DREAM OF THIS INSOMIAC

It was a romance-filled night last night.

My arms wrapped around my pillow, we inhaled our whiff of love and commitment watching Ally McBeal and Sting on Oprah. The whole time I was like, “ok, world! Rub it in. Romance is all around me, except with me. Put a little more salt and vinegar if you like.” Ah, bitterness! Isn’t it sweet?

If I were standing up, my knees would weaken at the very idea of being married with Sting and more so being truly loved by this man. He is such a HOT MAN. And not just because he is sexy and good-looking in a somewhat off-centered way. Sting was sizzling because he was a man who seemed to know how to show his love for his wife. His love would probably feel like a feast of Bicol Express and laing, both drowned in siling labuyo during a hot summer day by a white sandy beach. Fiercely hot. And damn, just imagining him manipulate words effortlessly into magical lyrics of consummate love that pluck your heart like his fingers on guitar strings… the idea just leaves me gasping for air.

Victor (Jon Bon Jovi) in Ally McBeal, on the other hand, is like drinking a cup of hot cocoa sprinkled with mini-marshmallows while sitting in front of a fireplace on a snowy day in January somewhere in the Aspen. Comfortably warm. He knows and loves children, gives the best advice, reads between the lines, knows your deepest desires without having you tell him and is your confidante and best friend. Victor is such a girl friend that it makes him SUCH A MAN. Oh, and not to mention that intense look that teases you into wanting him to put his arms around your waist and kiss you with both and tender affection and wild passion.

Sigh. The romance on television was so thick, I could slurp it with a straw and it would taste like strawberry shake (with real strawberry bits. Yum).

I was actually unaffected by everything initially. I lasted the Ally McBeal sighing and squealing for Ally and Victor and not once thinking about myself. Until Sting nuzzled Trudy. That was when I thought, “shucks, I miss nuzzling.”
I MISS NUZZLING. I do nuzzle my girl friends whenever I am in one of those fool-moon moods. Except Sting nuzzled Trudy. When Sting nuzzles Trudy, you do not remember nuzzling your female friends! You remember nuzzling, uhm… the person you love. Sigh.

When Oprah asks Trudy about what it felt when she and Sting first met (they claim to be soulmates), she answered, “IT’S KNOWING YOU’VE COME HOME.” And that is exactly how I have always felt about it. Once we had a survey in our barkada e-groups, one question was “most comfortable place in the world.” I answered, “d’s arms.” Oooh. Baduy but true. And not only comfy but safe as well.

I was kidding around with Rowie last night about the world conspiring about making me miserable by having the TV blare love at me during my moment of quasi-weakness. With dolby digital technology at that. Ha-ha, world. Make fun of me, won’t you.

Except it’s not making fun of me, I know. I actually think it’s a reminder that LOVE ACUALLY DOES EXIST (wait, Hugh Grant beat me to this line). That it will NEVER suffice to SETTLE. I think it came from “Dream of an Insomiac” (which I have not seen. Boo.), “ANYTHING OTHER THAN MAD, PASSIONATE LOVE IS A WASTE OF TIME.” Got that right. I’d rather be single and happy than committed but miserable. I wouldn’t want to waste efforts on a person I know will not be good for me nor on anyone I do not feel anything less than intense.

I want a person who is genuinely kind and respects everyone. I want a person who will not be afraid to accept the love I give him. I want a person who will not be afraid to give the love he has for me. I want a person who is not afraid to tell me I am wrong, yet will still comfort me when I cry. I want someone who can match my strength, yet will allow me to be weak when I need to be. I want someone who is strong, yet will not fret to show his weakness. I want someone who believes in God, or something else that is beyond him.

Love may come. Or it may not. There will be more lonely nights coming, that I am sure. At times I will be able to handle it and laugh it off. At times I won’t be and will end up crying on the pillow. But knowing who I am, I will never compromise on something as potent (in pain and in joy) as love.

Di ba?

RE-CYCLED FROM MY OLD POST

Here is the opening spiel of one of my favorite shows when I was a child.

Ano ang nasa dakong parron
Bunga ng malikot na pag-iisip
Likha ng balintataw
o halaw sa isang daigdig ng kababalaghan.
Di kayang ipaliwanag
ngunit alam mong magaganap.

I used to watch Pinoy Thriller on my own when I was a kid. By that time, everybody at home were already asleep except me. Scary no? I love this spiel.

BUMMING AND BUMMED

I came to work late and left early. That was to make up for the weekend they took when I was supposed to be resting from my trip from Tagum. So I watched Princess Diaries 2 in the afternoon. I couldn't do much work anyway. Too many things coming in one big rush. It has been an overwhelming day though nothing much really happened. Gah. Ang hirap when you are just "blabbing," things don't much sense. Basta.

Row's e-mail made me a bit, uhm, worried? depressed? something... about myself. I have not worried with my lack of direction and focus in life for the past years. I do not know what about her plans that might have struck a button. I mean it was something she has always articulated with us. But then... now... things are more definite. I feel everybody else is moving on except me. I did text her and found comfort in her words. It always helps when you are each other's rah-rah girl. The funny thing is despite getting worried about being directionless, I can't still make myself plan for something. Everything around me still feels so tentative. Davao. Work. Relationships. But like what Row told me, "kanya-kanyang ritmo lang iyan." And I do so believe in dancing to the rhythm of life. Pero Row, salamat sa pambubulabog. :)

And then there is friendster. I have known a lot of people who had their world's rocked with finding out information on friendster. That is why I never bother much looking through old flames that may still affect me. No, it's nothing like seeing "in a relationship" in the status box. My world wouldn't just rock but crumble if one day I see that. We do have an agreement he will tell me these things as it is always best to have info straight from the horse's mouth. The question mark I have gotten so used to be in that box labeled Angie's friends finally has his picture in it. Actually the first thing I say was a picture of him with a girl, so I rushed to look. He'd get a good tongue lashing from me if that status suddenly changed! It was a friend of ours. Whew. Pero my heart started thumping hard. I get to see his face again. How irritating that he is so damn cute. Agh. Kooky smile and crooked nose (basketball accident). What could a lady ask for? Hah. Wala lang. It's just... agh... it's just a picture and I'm acting all silly. Blech. Blech. Blech.

Excuse me while I bang my head on the keyboards.

yi88y6oi8eruieueueirlfjskfij.

There. I promise to be a little more sane in the next entry. Well, maybe not.

Look alike ko!

Here is the picture of quint in the inquirer. Thanks to Tatit for scanning! Ain't he adorable?! (He will kill me if he finds out about this post. Heheheh!) 

Q

I was intent on writing about my trip to Banlud and Kanlamaon in Mabini, Compostela Valley today. It was definitely an exciting trip and quite challenging to my mental survival but then I received a lot of text messages from friends reporting that my JVP Partner, Quint, has been featured in yesterday’s Inquirer and that my name was mentioned as well. So I decided to postpone that biyahe for Quint. By the way, the writer of the article was our officemate during our volunteer year and was a former JVP herself (Batch 12).

Among closer friends, he’s more popularly known as Q. Sometimes I’d call him that but I more often than not called him Quint. Rose called him Sport. After she died, I started calling him that and he started calling me Baby Girl (Rose’s own pet name for me, or more precisely Bebeh Ghel but Quint would never be caught pronouncing it that way.). I guess that was our way of hanging on to one of the threads that bound us together as JVP partners.

Q was not able to take part of the Batch 19 Orientation Seminar because he had to attend his graduation in Georgetown. So I was not able to meet him until two weeks after I was already sent to the area (June 11, 1998, a day before the Philippine Centennial.). The funny thing was during the Manila pre-orientation seminar, we were kidding about premonitions about our area assignments and such. I joked around saying, “ha! Partner ko ang Georgetown boy. Bet ko pogi siya.” Yaiks! Lo and behold, I did get him for a partner. And he was indeed supposed to be good-looking. They said he looked like Brendan Frasier and Ricky Martin. Patay! Pareho ko pa namang crush. Mukhang manganganib ang rule number 7 (during that time, there was no rule number 7 but during the previous years it meant that JVP could not get involved with anyone from the area or with their batchmates. It was reinstated two years after)!

He came to Calapan City with Rose and Zaza (the LPA during that time). Za got to the jeep first and came to me all excited. “Ang gwapo niya ano?!” I looked at the approaching Fil-Am and nodded my head. “Oo, pero di ko type.” And I meant it. Plus I disagree with the fact that he looks like Ricky Martin or Brendan Frasier. I insisted that he had an uncanny resemblance to Dranreb Belleza minus the drugged disposition. Until now, I stand by that belief.

And so he came to Calapan. There was no instant connection or anything. I was a bit wary about his habits as he might be to coño for my taste. My supervisor, Fr. Mimo, on the other hand, took to him like fish in the water. They were like old pals who talked about anything and everything. So I was like… “salamat, ha. Gusto niyo ako ipadala na lang uli sa ibang area. Mukhang okay na kayo.” SELOS!!! Hahaha! Tristan was privy to all that through our letters.

Once I came running to Mimo crying because Quint refused to watch a Jackie Chan flick with me. I loved Jackie Chan. He hated him. I think Mimo was trying hard not to laugh while he was trying to appease my injured ego. God, I was such a baby! Hahaha!

So it was a love-“i-just-can’t-understand-you” relationship during our first three months. The latter emotion coming mostly from me. It was only when I showed him around to our batchmates during our zonals that I felt so proud of my partner. And when he got to meet the entire batch during the midyear, it was there I realized that I was protective of him. That I did not like people disliking my partner, that I wanted them to see how great a mind he is. How great a heart he has.

I LOVE Quint so much. That one year in Calapan was a wonderful time for both of us. Not only with each other but with the people there. The experience of Mindoro was overwhelming (as indicated in the article) for both of us and for Adette (our other JVP partner who came to Calapan after midyear). But it was really memories of our friendship that stood out. Memories that remain vivid to this day, both in image and feeling.

We would spend the dusk in the front porch of our house in Tawiran with the lights off and our feet on the table. The silhouette of Mt. Halcon prominent in the darkness, he would sip his chilled Pale Pilsen. Drinking both the beer and view. He’d put his arms around me and I would place my head on his shoulders.

Mornings, Adette and I would usually wake before he does. We’d go about preparing breakfast, there he would be, wrapped in his malong and a groggy smile on his face. He’d give bear hug both me and Adette greeting us with, “good morning to my girls!” We’d pretend to squirm and be grossed out when in truth we are thrilled.

There was one time he left his journal lying around the table. I told him, “you know, you shouldn’t leave this lying around because anybody can just read it.” To which he answered, “just try.” So I did. Kainis. It was in Spanish. Hmph. Another time, I wanted to borrow some of his books. He told me to pick anything in his closet. Ek. Three fourths of what he had were in Spanish! Kainis. Hahaha!

One year with him has just been filled with so so many great memories that there would not be enough pages to put them all down. TSP (kuwentuhan) under heavy rains while God took our picture over and over. Throwing mudballs at each other in our yard (guess who lost). Dolphin riding in the beach (I hung on to his shoulders while he dolphin swam). Riding Mimo’s motorbike in the ricefields (and he always got irritated when people looked at him strangely. I told him, “hey, guess what they think of the little brown girl riding at your back?!” Snorkeling in the Pulo. Shawarma dinners (two please) in Fiesta Persia while watching ESPN.

With the kind of intimacy, people often ask if I never really did like him that way. No. No. No. (Pero I doubt if anybody asked him if he ever fell for me. Hmph. Porke siya sobrang gwapo at ako mildly maganda lang. Hmph.). No, I never liked him that way. But I think I love him just a little less than a mother and a girlfriend. It may not be easy to grasp. Believe me, romance would just ruin one of the greatest relationships I have in my life.

Sigh. I love love love love Quint!

Just got back from Compostela Valley (as in I still have my bag and ilang piling ng saging). Not tired despite walking yesterday for several hours and also today despite carrying my bag. Cool. Maybe I could really do the Apo climb soon.

Anyway, short lang ito. Just something funny.

Seen in Tagum City.

WE SALE!
LACTOBACILLUS
(inquire inside)

isa lang ang binebenta nila, sale pa!
mwahahaha!

PAGOD AKO.

Di ko maintindihan kung bakit. Maybe because I shouldn't be here at the office on a Saturday when I am supposed to have a day-off. But things are in a rush this month. There are things that need to be done. And something I am thankful for. I have use after all. Except the workload had wrong timing to come. Sigh.

I am supposed to have another day off on Monday, but I will still be working a bit. Sipag. Nyahaha! Suck-ass lang siguro because in a month's time I'll be working for a year. Raise! I hope. *cross fingers*

Pero masaya pa din kahit papaano. Just a bit pensive though.

*****

Picked up from mich dulce's blog. Pampasaya lang.

(Based on my memory na lang ha, i do not remember our davao streets when i was three)

YOUR PORN STAR NAME:(NAME OF FIRST PET + STREET YOU LIVE IN)
tiny 3rd (nge!)

YOUR MOVIE STAR NAME:(NAME OF YOUR FAVOURITE SNACK FOOD + GRANDFATHERS FIRST NAME)
pringles alberto (mas porn ang dating nito!)

YOUR FASHION DESIGNER NAME:(FIRST WORD YOU SEE ON YOUR LEFT + FAVOURITE RESTRAUNT) may delongtes (ang pangit!)

EXOTIC FOREIGNER ALIAS:(Favorite Spice + Last Vacation Spot Visited) pepper dumaguete (that is so not foreign!)

SOCIALITE ALIAS: (Silliest Childhood Nickname+ Town Where You First Partied)
hyper angeles (uy, maybe i WILL marry hero angeles)

FLY GIRL" ALIAS (a la J. Lo): (First Initial +First Two or Three Letters of your Last Name)-- a.re

ICON ALIAS: (Something Sweet Within Sight +Any Liquid in Kitchen)--
chocolate water

DETECTIVE ALIAS: (Favorite Baby Animal + Where You Went to High School)--
kitten kulasa (pangit kasi kung kitten st. scho)

BARFLY ALIAS: (Last Snack Food You Ate +Your Favorite Alcoholic Drink)--
black margarita (oooh, i like!)

SOAP OPERA ALIAS: (Middle Name + StreetWhere You First Lived) marie 3rd (anubayan!)

ROCK STAR ALIAS: (Favorite Candy/Dessert +Last Name Of Favorite Musician)
nerds semana (asteeeg)